daughter is a busy body and doesn't want to sit thru flashcards

[bestmom]

My LO is a busy body and doesn't sit still for very long. She loves watching YBCR but can't seem to sit thru flashcards or any session with me. She use to sit thru me reading a whole book with her but now she doesn't even sit thru that and turns the pages before I can read it and get angry if I turn it back. I don't want to force her into the sessions but it seems she doesn't really like it which makes me not really want to do it. Then I feel horrible for not teaching her anything at this susceptible age. She seems kind of all over the place now...won't eat sitting still either. I'd have to follow her around and feed her. I have to sleep next to her until she's fast asleep. How can I break these cycles of bad habits? I really do love her I just don't want to give her bad habits. I love snuggling up with her at night but it's starting to get out of hand. I don't want to expect too much from her because she's only 18 months or should I be concerned? Any advice?  Thanks in advance. 

[reei]

when you do flash cards, flash something interesting that she likes to see. slip one or two of her photos, or daddy's photo in between, maybe she likes that, or something she likes to see, any cartoon character or something.
my daughter can't sit through flash cards, i ask her to hold her soft toy, and said 'we need to show panda flash cards', but then she hold panda upright and look at the flash cards at the same time.
sometimes she cover her eyes and look elsewhere,, like playing hide and seek, then i'll ask , 'oh, where is tt,,? where is tt?, oh there you are.. '.

[mom2bee]

Try investing in other videos, like Monki See Monki Doo, since she likes videos, maybe you could make short videos of you flashing cards (10-30 seconds each) and play that for her a few times.

I recommend setting some ground rules where eating is concerned. You eat in the dining room/table area. Every day, every time. When she is running around refusing to eat, leave her food in the proper room, call her to eat but do NOT take the food to her.

She will not starve to death, I swear. It might take a few days, but you should teach her to only eat in a couple of acceptable places and that is that.

I'm sure you know by now that sleep wars occur in almost every house that has a baby. You could try getting a musical track of soothing sounds,  5-10 minutes long and playing it for her, when the music stops, mommy leaves. Period. Shes old enough now that you should know she's not at high-risk for Sids or anything like that.

You could try putting a little distance between she and you every few days/each week.
Cuddle in bed with her
Lay in bed with her
Recline on the edge of the bed
Sit in a chair, next to her bed, stroking her back
Sit in a chair humming/singing along
Sit in a chair next to her
Begin moving the chair a little from the bed until your only in the room. When you are about 1/2 way between her bed and door, be in the room, moving around (tidying up, dancing very softly or whatever, just be moving around quietly while the music plays)

Then, get used to putting her to bed and staying for a few minutes and then leaving while the music still plays. Hopefully she'll be sleeping without you in a month or so.

You could also try getting a special stuffed animal and teach just that stuffed animal the flash cards words and do it with enthusiasm and joy each time and congratulate the toy as if its done a stupendous job each time. She may wonder over and decide to watch.

You may need to do one or two words a day for a while. Let her watch educational shows like Between the Lions, Leap Frog and other phonic/ready to read type DVD's. Put labels on everything in her room and around the house so that she can see the words naturally.

Maybe instead of flashing words, you could present her with a few labeled items each day.

This is hammer

[hypatia]

tape words on the wall, in a hallway. Some up high and show it to her when you carry her, and some at her level.

[bestmom]

Try investing in other videos, like Monki See Monki Doo, since she likes videos, maybe you could make short videos of you flashing cards (10-30 seconds each) and play that for her a few times.

I recommend setting some ground rules where eating is concerned. You eat in the dining room/table area. Every day, every time. When she is running around refusing to eat, leave her food in the proper room, call her to eat but do NOT take the food to her.

She will not starve to death, I swear. It might take a few days, but you should teach her to only eat in a couple of acceptable places and that is that.

I'm sure you know by now that sleep wars occur in almost every house that has a baby. You could try getting a musical track of soothing sounds,  5-10 minutes long and playing it for her, when the music stops, mommy leaves. Period. Shes old enough now that you should know she's not at high-risk for Sids or anything like that.

You could try putting a little distance between she and you every few days/each week.
Cuddle in bed with her
Lay in bed with her
Recline on the edge of the bed
Sit in a chair, next to her bed, stroking her back
Sit in a chair humming/singing along
Sit in a chair next to her
Begin moving the chair a little from the bed until your only in the room. When you are about 1/2 way between her bed and door, be in the room, moving around (tidying up, dancing very softly or whatever, just be moving around quietly while the music plays)

Then, get used to putting her to bed and staying for a few minutes and then leaving while the music still plays. Hopefully she'll be sleeping without you in a month or so.

You could also try getting a special stuffed animal and teach just that stuffed animal the flash cards words and do it with enthusiasm and joy each time and congratulate the toy as if its done a stupendous job each time. She may wonder over and decide to watch.

You may need to do one or two words a day for a while. Let her watch educational shows like Between the Lions, Leap Frog and other phonic/ready to read type DVD's. Put labels on everything in her room and around the house so that she can see the words naturally.

Maybe instead of flashing words, you could present her with a few labeled items each day.

This is hammer

Thanks for the very helpful advice. If I leave the food where she can reach it (which is on the floor, if I put it in her highchair she can't reach it)  she will dump it on the floor and rub it into the ground and run off. At most she takes a few bites. What should I do?

[waterdreamer]

Pamela from TW says children learn best when they are moving so maybe have her chase you while you run backwards flashing cards at her. As for feedings, strap her in her highchair and being firm. If she throws her food on the floor, take her out and have her pick it up. I watch a little girl who was a food thrower. She has dogs at home so this was reinforcing. What I did was stop the meal as soon as the first piece of food was thrown, then take her out and have her clean it up(she was 14months at the time) the first week we did hand over hand clean up(basically me cleaning it up with her hands) she screamed the first two days, then resisted without screaming the rest of the week, then after that she would pick up the food without me helping and put it in my hand. She then had one more chance to finish her food, if more was thrown she would clean it up and the rest of the food would be removed and she had to wait in her highchair till everyone was done eating( this way you are not reinforcing throwing food = get away from the table) then she would have to wait till the next meal to eat (I serve my toddlers food every 2 hours, so she didn't suffer a long wait) if she screamed her head of while the rest of ate we ignored the behavior and praised everyone that was sitting nice for there behavior. If the screaming got unbearable a firm talking to was issued. This system worked so well her mother came during snack time and asked me for my secret and informed it ate home. Now a days my floor is a lot cleaner. 

[bestmom]

Pamela from TW says children learn best when they are moving so maybe have her chase you while you run backwards flashing cards at her. As for feedings, strap her in her highchair and being firm. If she throws her food on the floor, take her out and have her pick it up. I watch a little girl who was a food thrower. She has dogs at home so this was reinforcing. What I did was stop the meal as soon as the first piece of food was thrown, then take her out and have her clean it up(she was 14months at the time) the first week we did hand over hand clean up(basically me cleaning it up with her hands) she screamed the first two days, then resisted without screaming the rest of the week, then after that she would pick up the food without me helping and put it in my hand. She then had one more chance to finish her food, if more was thrown she would clean it up and the rest of the food would be removed and she had to wait in her highchair till everyone was done eating( this way you are not reinforcing throwing food = get away from the table) then she would have to wait till the next meal to eat (I serve my toddlers food every 2 hours, so she didn't suffer a long wait) if she screamed her head of while the rest of ate we ignored the behavior and praised everyone that was sitting nice for there behavior. If the screaming got unbearable a firm talking to was issued. This system worked so well her mother came during snack time and asked me for my secret and informed it ate home. Now a days my floor is a lot cleaner. 

That sounds great!! There might be a problem in my case since it's just me and her alone and I don't usually eat because I'm feeding her and I don't have a table yet (still trying to afford one). So what should I do now? 

[mom2bee]

You're going to have to get creative specific to your situation.

So what if you don't have a table. Sit your kid down and instill the discipline during meal times Buy one of those picnic table cloths if you gus eat on the floor, spread it out when you'll eat and dont let her carry the food away.

If you have a highchair for her, do not leave the food in the floor, put it up on her highchair, strap her in it and let that be that. Put only a couple morsels of food on the tray, if she throws them, tell her no and force her to clean it up (as waterdreamer described--hand on hand, clean up.)

Be CONSISTENT. Do it daily, you must show firmness each time she is rebellious, she isn't going to starve or anything. But Mommy is going to have possess a firm back bone and the intestinal fortitude to stand up to her kid. (Grow a spine and get some guts. Stand up to your kid and teach her manners now, from the beginning)

[bestmom]

You're going to have to get creative specific to your situation.

So what if you don't have a table. Sit your kid down and instill the discipline during meal times Buy one of those picnic table cloths if you gus eat on the floor, spread it out when you'll eat and dont let her carry the food away.

If you have a highchair for her, do not leave the food in the floor, put it up on her highchair, strap her in it and let that be that. Put only a couple morsels of food on the tray, if she throws them, tell her no and force her to clean it up (as waterdreamer described--hand on hand, clean up.)

Be CONSISTENT. Do it daily, you must show firmness each time she is rebellious, she isn't going to starve or anything. But Mommy is going to have possess a firm back bone and the intestinal fortitude to stand up to her kid. (Grow a spine and get some guts. Stand up to your kid and teach her manners now, from the beginning)

She's sick and already underweight...I think I will wait til after she's better to start the reform. Thanks for the advice. Do you think I'm expecting too much from her? I mean she is already is underweight and a picky eater.

[bestmom]

@ waterdreamer:

When you made the kid clean up, did she cry the whole time thru and fight the whole time? If so, what did you do? I'm a new mom so I'm a little insecure when it comes to my baby crying..I just want to make sure I'm doing the right thing by making her clean up her mess.

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