momtomany
Posts: 91
Karma: 46 Baby: 7 Latest: 0y 3m 11d
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« Reply #18 on: June 27, 2009, 02:33:06 PM » |
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I've done it all and here are my thoughts...
With baby number one, she slept in a crib... through the night 12 hours from 2 to 7 months... but then she started waking up in the night and co-sleeping just kind of evolved with her. She co-slept FOREVER it seems and when she was about 5 it was really hard to get her into her own room. We were quite into attachment parenting by that time and we were okay with it... but by 5 years old it felt like it was definitely time!
With baby number two, we sold the crib. We put the mattress on the floor, used a bedrail, and taught her early on to get off the bed feet first. (As she started to crawl hands and knees at 5 months, she was also quite capable at this early on).
With baby number three, we co-slept also.
When baby number four came along things weren't working so well with this co-sleeping anymore. I couldn't spend a long long time getting the little guy settled to fast asleep (he only could fall asleep nursing), because I had three other ones to put to bed also. Our new house didn't have a big master bedroom where we could have a twin and queen bed right beside each other to make one large bed either. So when number 4 came along we bought a crib and kept it right beside our bed with the rail off. That worked for a while, but then we put the house on the market and having such an unconventional setup in the small master bedroom just made the room look way to small for potential buyers, so we decided to make a change. At the same time I realized it just wasn't working that the little guy could only go to sleep nursing. So with fairly quick graduating steps, we put him in his own crib in his own room and his routine became story, breastfeed, teeth/pajamas, put in bed, go to sleep on his own. I was VERY consistent and so, even though he did cry a lot the first couple of nights, I didn't budge and within 2 weeks he was rarely crying about going to bed at all or maybe only for 30 seconds. Oh... what a wonderful freeing thing this was for all of us! And the little guy started to sleep through the night and he was more rested and happier during the day too. (He was about 16months if you're wondering).
With baby number 5 we had him in our bed for those first few weeks, but then more often in his crib in our room. We never put our bed on the floor, so when he became mobile it wasn't safe to leave him alone on our bed anymore. When number 6 was on the way, we moved him to his own room and I did the same as I did with number 4... in steps got him to going to sleep on his own in his own room... I did it more gradually (over 3 or 4 months) and, looking back, I think it was harder on him this way actually.
With baby number 6, I rarely had him in our bed (only those first couple of weeks on occasion if he woke in the night and I was really tired and would nurse him beside me in bed). I made an effort to always put him down to sleep when he was sleepy, fed, but still awake... to encourage his ability to fall asleep on his own. (I recommend the book The Baby Whisperer). I made an effort to work towards a regular sleep routine (same bedtime, naptime, waking up time) because I needed this predictability in my day and because I believe it is better for them. So by 8 weeks old he was very consistently sleeping through the night about 10 hours every night. If he woke up (rarely anymore) then I didn't rush to him if he wasn't screaming and almost always he got himself to sleep within a couple of minutes. I felt a little uncertain about letting him cry even a little, but it was important to me that he keep up those lovely sleep habits, and I think I made the right decision for our whole family. At about 4 months old there was no point to have his crib in our room anymore (sometimes he was stirring when we were coming to bed at night... not always at a good moment, if you know what I mean!... why wake a sleeping baby?!) He's 11 months and since then he's woken in the night less than a dozen times altogether for sure... usually if he's sick or something. I can't tell you how nice this is.
I really think co-sleeping is a wonderful thing. Everyone gets a good night's sleep... I read some research that when you co-sleep then the baby and Mom get into the same sleep cycle so that when the babe wakes up, the Mom is in a light sleep, and they are in the deep sleep times together too. I believe it is perfectly safe with a couple rules... firm mattress, fitted bottom sheet, no dangly cords on parents' sleepwear, no alcohol or sleeping medication, I have reservations about safety if either parent is extremely obese. You will NOT roll over onto your baby in your sleep, and any healthy full-term baby will make a big squirming fuss if they are being smoothered at all. I also believe that having a baby that can sleep through the night is a WONDERFUL thing. Most important and beneficial for your baby though is that you chose what will work for you and be very consistent about it. Consistency in their routine is more important than whether you co-sleep or don't co-sleep with your baby. And there are my thoughts on that matter.
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