i guess in the end, all we need is a long thread of patience! im totaly convinced taht its a phase where eventually issam will soon outgrow it. hehas not reached to the point total breakout or hitting and that stuff which i am happy. patience lots of patience is my virtue now....thanks guys, happy weekend

hi verolpj,

i have a 22months old son and till now i sterlized all his things from bottles, zippy cups spoons n most of his toys though i did not used a sterilizer like one you have. i just put them in a big pot with water and let it boil for 5mins.
i suggest if you see any deformalities on ur sterilizer or its forming a residue at the bottom, stop using it, switch to the traditional old fashion way. if its chip or cracked just dont use it anymore. also, i used pigeon bottle soap which is safe for kids should they swallow it bec sometimes we think we have rinse off the dishwashing soap enough but there are still some of the suds left so just to be safe, i used this one specifically when i wash his feeding things.

thanks guys for the insights, at least now i know that its not only me who is having this issue, i'd like to think that this is phase of a toddler and hopefully he will soon outgrow this refusal stage.

In my opinion as a mom of 6 kids, they need to know that you are the boss.  This means that if you tell your child that they are changing, they need to do it joyfully because you said it.  If they are not cooperative you can incorporate a bit of pain to get their attention such as a small pinch on the arm or leg.  In a very calm voice you repeat what you expect of your child and continue as if they will agree, if they again offer resistance, you must repeat your pinch with your instructions.  After a few commands given in this way, you should have a very agreeable toddler.

I had the opportunity to witness a toddler having a fit at Target the other day.  He was crying in the cart and the mom was ignoring him as she checked out.  He started to call her "stupid mommy" more than one time.  I was and still am very disturbed by this behavior.  I would have loved to say something to the mom, maybe she doesn't know how to deal with this behavior.  A toddler that calls his mother a stupid mommy at 2 years old and is not corrected for this behavior will call her far worse at 8 or 10.  Parents need to teach their children to respect them and that they are the boss.  This all begins at birth.  They challenge you during the terrible twos but I honestly can tell you that my kids never went through the terrible twos because my husband and I would never tolerate this behavior.

hi krista g, thanks for the input. i have also reached to this point but as much as possible would not want to keep doing this method, i find it really heart breaking for me to pinch or lay hands on my child. though  i commpletely agree with you that a child misbehaving at an early age should be corrected immediately bec in the long run its the parents who will be blame for racing a mischief child.

Catalina is 23 months old ,I noticed she was doing the same thing since 1 month ago or so. Everytime we have to change her clothes, put her shoes on, or jacket on..etc she will start refusing. She doesn't do that anymore, I guess she just forgot about it. What we did is we always had a book handy , I will keep her entertain while we get her dress but now I ask her for help, please bring me yours shoes and your jacket we will go in a ride in the car..would you like to came? she will go and get them for me, she tries to put her shoes on and her jacket on..(she still needs a little bit help).
I will suggest you to distract him with something while you change him, book,toy..whatever, and then maybe ask him for help..to be part of the activity.

py, believed me, i have done this as well, i have even offered gadgets which interest him i.e. mobiles, mp3 name it. but once he has it in his hands he would ran away to the corner or to the edge of the bed and we r back to the begginning again. if you said that ur kid used to do it and then she stops, should i assume its a phase only? thanks though for ur input.

Hi JSMonton,

My son is also 22 months and sometimes we have the same problem...actually, it has somewhat diminished since we started "The Plan" 2 weeks ago.  When he wakes up in the morning we don't change him right away (unless he has a poopy diaper).  He gets a banana and a few stories read to him by dad.  Then he seems to be ready to get out of his "cozy clothes" and start the day.  (It is only AFTER changing into day clothes that we offer him breakfast.) We do this after nap time, too...a snack, some stories & cuddling and then a change.  Also, he doesn't mind diaper changes so we'll often wait for changing clothes until then...and sometimes we sacrifice a fairly clean diaper for a new one so that mommy's agenda of new clothes can come to fruition

I'm wondering if you can give him options...ie. say: We're going to put on your play clothes now. (no choice)  Would you like your grey pants or your blue jeans? (his choice)  This sometimes works for my son...I may even let him make his choice by letting him pull the article of clothing out of his closet on his own.

I understand your frustration.  Our little turkey discovered that if he grabs the inside of his sleeve Mommy has an extra hard time getting the shirt off!

hi kizudo, thanks for the advice , this used to worked well before the refusal stage. he would pick up the color of the shirt he wants to wear but now its just getting the "cozy clohes " off which is causing the struggle.

Do you allow him to help you dress and undress him?

yes i do allow him to help me get him dress/undress even if means a further delays but still...

hello everyone!

i have been away for a long time and hope that all is well. i have a current dilemma with my 22months son! everytime we need to change clothes its becoming a big scene with all the crying,refusing and NO NO thing and its really getting into me these days which is why i post this thread to seek some advice.

i just dont get it why my son keeps on hurdling on what he was was wearing and would totally refuse to change say from pjs to day/playtime clothes or from outing ( which he wears when he go out to school or malls) to house clothes!   n its really a struggle! just dunno what to do now to make it less stressfull for both of us.

please help!

whew!what a relief!thanks for the information nhockaday! is selsun blue safe to use on our toddlers?i'm always skeptical to use adult products on my son
thanks again for the great information.

my son has a soft curly hair, i shampooed his hair everyday with J&J shampoo with a pea size amount. I have noticed that whenever he feels hot or his head started to be wet with perspiration, (especially if the a/c is almost like a fun or after he made some running here n there)he would scratch his head! he does not play with other kids in the park, he hardly associate with other kids so i don't assume he would catch it from his playmates. i tried to check his hair thoroughly but have not seen anything in particular.
is there something i can do to help my son?is his scratching means he have head lice?

just like nhockaday, i always wanted a girl and is hoping for a girl for the second one. but i am so much inlove with my son and will be forever greatful to God for giving me my son as my first born, making my first timer mom experience really pleasurable and blessed.
i guess the reason why people often say that is because boys tend to be more difficult when it comes to parenting, they involve more patience, more action such as wrestling and boxing games, boys are also known to be clutter freak, not to mention the enormous advices we need to provide them as they make choices in life. however with girls, they tend to be more quiet, easy to handle, more passive than the boys.
these are just from my point of view, would not really categorized all boys like this.

thanks KL!i was sure i have missed alot already from here...will download it asap.

hi everybody!its been a while since i last visited the forum and for sure have missed alot!we have been away for almost 3 months for a family vacation, visited back home and went to see my in laws as well...
during this long vacation, the routine of doing lil reader n math with my son has become less n less because of so many things when ur on vacation. until we dont do it at all for almost the entire vacation.
now, that we r back from our holidays, wnted to start up the program again with my son but he seemed no longer interested. how do i get back to our old routine and get him interested as before....
please send me advise on this, i have seen a pretty good progress already on my son and its a pity if it will go to waste..

my son is a big time babbler!he was making babbling sounds since he was like 3 months old, his first word was " mama" which i of course thought meant me  but he was referring to milk instead. then he said "ma" addressing to me finally!he said "baba"(local term for daddy) when he was like 7months old.
barney was his first real word ! and that was when he was 11months!
he still do not have much vocabulary. he is exposed to 3 languages (English,Arabic, Filipino {Tagalog})he also have small exposure to french since his lullabies dvd are sung in it.

my son recognizes the word blue, ball and balloon from the b words set and he also recognizes ear,dog ,teddy. once he saw the words he would mumble it it may not be very clear though but very similar, like almost right!
when we r using the stair case, he would start saying "an" for one and sounding like sounds for the next which is really very impressive bec i know he is trying to count with me!
even my parents find it amusing that he sounds like counting though his words are really not that clear. its only the 1, 6 and 10 comes really clear!
they said that if only my son can really speak clearly by now then they will not be surprise if he really can count by now!