I just attended a seminar about parenting and the speaker suggested an old book called 5 love languages by Gary Chapman. He said that it be helpful for parents to understand their children if they know their love language. He gave an example, one parent kept giving praises and encouragement to her child but her child didn't seem to appreciate it, only to find out that the love language of the child was Quality Time. As soon as she spent more time with her child, they understood and cared for each other more.
For those who have not read the book, there is a website where your child (5yrs old above) can take a test. I have yet to let my 7-yr old daughter try the test. You and your spouse can check your love language too.
The website is:
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/