feeling very very overwhamed and fustrated

[anneka7187]

lately i have been feeling over whalmed i work full time and have3 kids under 6.  it seems as if i can not get any thing done ask hubby for help he will not i feel as if i want to leave the situation any advice will help a lot   

[KL]

Hi Anneka,

Can't really give you much advice except to say that, from my experience, things are usually not as bad as we imagine. Once we shift our focus to all the positive things in our lives (of which I'm very sure you will find many), many so-called 'big' problems start to become trivial.

Good luck with all that you're dealing with!

[Twinergy]

Hi Anneka,
I can tell you some things that helped me when I felt overwhelmed... 

Often times good enough is better than perfect.  I found myself focusing so much on trying to be the perfect mom that I missed out on the really important things.  Which reminds me of my second point: take the time to connect with those you love and really be in the moment.  Think about things like how their hair smells when you hug them, soak it in.  How does it make you feel?  I hope you understand my meaning.

Anyway, these things really helped me get through some difficult times, I hope you can find some use for them too. 

[Krista G]

On days when I feel overwhelmed I ask myself, "What can I do right now that will make me feel like I have accomplished something?"  Once I know what I need to do immediately I can attack it and that positive energy gets me moving on a positive path.  Sometimes my answer is that I need to exercise, or spend an hour working, read a book to my child, or whatever you feel is pressing and will give you a sense of accomplishment.

Best to you...

[NadiaD]

We all here parents and totally understand how you feel
I agree with previous posts  that, please, do not try to be perfect, and please do do do try to get more sleep, It really helps me to go through the day.
Just pick 2-3 things that are really important each day (pay the bill, play with your children for an hour, feed the family )
 write them down, cross them of your list once you're done with them and  you will see that  actually  more things gets done.
God Bless you and I really hope that you'll feel better

[2010BEBES]

Hello Anneka,

I hope you had a break and rest enough. Only if you are relax then you can start with any program. Maybe reduce the activities and take turns with your kids.
Keep in mind that your children realize how you feel even though you try not to show it and in order to have success all of you need to have good time while learning.
On the other hand don't get the idea that all babies or children excell in reading or doing math. Children have different forms of learning and the important thing is to be together, enjoy, be happy and have fun.
Please keep us posted.

[PY]

Dear Anneka,
I understand how you feel, sometimes we wish we could have more hours in our day. It is natural you feel that way! between work, house chores,kids and husband...etc. you don't find enough time to do what you really wish. But I have learned from experience that I have to be organized with my schedule. iF YOU DON'T HAVE A plan for next day...you will feel unproductive!
Also sometimes it is nice to relax, and read some books on bed to your kids for hours with no worries!!(I know we don't have the chance to do this very often...eh?) But it is nice to have the time to do it at least  twice a month or so.
Also don't you forget that there is always a bright day after a dark one!! No matter what , just be positive and try to organize  a little bit more your days..doesn't matter about quantity of work, you just can make one good activity for your kids a day instead of 3-4-5..etc where all you will became frustrated and forget about the fun!

[reei]

Dear Anneka,

Sometimes when I feel overwhelmed, I cry in the shower.

Just focus on your kids when you are overwhelmed, how would you want the kids to act if they are in your shoes.?

The kind of marriage and life we have, will affect the upbringing of our kids..

How about pamper yourself with facial.. or spa.. or something like that.. Sometimes walking the dog is good to get some fresh air. Good luck .



http://parentinglittlerblogspot.com

[rugrat]

Hello Anneka,

I hope you're feeling better...

Try not to feel so bad if you're not able to do everything, remember you're not a super woman (although sometimes I wish I was!),  just do what you can and leave the rest for another day or don't bother at all unless it's absolutely necessary.  I am a SAHM and even I feel overwhelmed at times.  I have very bad RA and some days I physically can not move very well and mentally I can't function due to the excruciating pain that I have all over my joints, but I just remind myself that I did the best I could that day and it's ok to just sit back to watch my son play and not worry about cooking, cleaning or showing flashcards to him.

Have you tried doing a schedule and splitting some of the chores with your husband?  I know some of my friends have tried splitting small chores with their husband and it has really worked out for them, for instants one of my friend has got her husband to change their little boys diaper at home (when they're out and about it's her job), fold the clothes as well as clean and cut up fruits... it's not a lot, but it has really helped her.  My other friend, after she gave birth to her 2nd child, she gave the responsibility of the older child to him... he's job was to bathe him, brush his teeth, change his clothes, read to him and put him to bed.  If you decide to split some of the chores with you husband it may help if you have it written down yours and his chores and stick to the refridgerater, this way he well realise how much more you are doing and he won't be upset or forget to do his part.

Lots of luck with what ever you try to do and keep us posted on it.

[McDume]

I always try to remember that I'm doing the most important, PRODUCTIVE job of all -- caring for my kids. It's not easy in the moment, often incredibly hard and even demoralizing... but I am quite sure that I won't be on my death bed regretting that I spent too much time with my kids.

Be well.

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