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Author Topic: How do you deal with this?  (Read 7097 times)
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reei
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« on: March 22, 2011, 01:06:06 AM »

It so happened that I was sharing the video and photos of my daughter's first violin performance with one colleague and the others who passed by quickly come and look. People were quick to comment that violin and piano learning should really start at the age of 5 , any earlier, the kids will learn the wrong finger placing , wrong posture and all. I just kept quiet. Then they want to know where she goes for violin lesson, how much it costs and all.. Not that I don't want to share the information, but they are not curious for info to send kids to learn. Just want to know and comment.. negative , unwanted comments.
What to do?

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Kimba15
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« Reply #1 on: March 22, 2011, 01:19:29 AM »

You could politely say that you have been reading alot lately about the benefits of teaching music to youn children when they are 2 1/2 - 3. You could then say the people who wrote the article recommended to start teaching children as young as 2 1/2-3. This way they can't argue with you asthis information is coming from an 'expert'. If they ask where you got just tell them to google Music and young children or music and the brain. It comes up with heaps of information under those titles.


This way they are off your back and if they want more info than you know they are genuinly interested.

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akalori
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« Reply #2 on: March 22, 2011, 01:22:29 AM »

Mozart was composing at the ripe age of 5 yrs old. Wink   They are just jealous.

Lori

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reei
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« Reply #3 on: March 22, 2011, 01:30:32 AM »

I did say something like I've seen kids playing usually keyboard at the age of 2 or 3. One of the lady said, her friend who is piano teacher suggested age 5 at least. Anyway, really dont want to start a debate in office about early learning music versus traditional method at age 5.

The good news is. My mil who initially said, letting my daughter performed in a concert was a waste of money, finally agreed with me that the concert was good for her. My daughter asked to play the violin for her yesterday. MIL said, it has helped my daughter develop interest in violin. smile

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TracyR4
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« Reply #4 on: March 22, 2011, 03:06:46 AM »

It could be if they are thinking about teaching other people's kids. If I were a music teacher and had to teach a child younger than five, well it would be hard. The younger they are their attention spans are lacking.  Of course some children are the exception to that rule. Most aren't though. Many little ones have a hard time sitting still, listening and following direction etc.  So this is where their thinking maybe.

Not sure. If not just grin and smile, nod your head and let it go in one ear and out the other. That's all you can do with skeptical people. They aren't looking for any answer. They are just trying to be negative.

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Tracy
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Twinergy
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« Reply #5 on: March 22, 2011, 09:38:53 AM »

It so happened that I was sharing the video and photos of my daughter's first violin performance with one colleague and the others who passed by quickly come and look. People were quick to comment that violin and piano learning should really start at the age of 5 , any earlier, the kids will learn the wrong finger placing , wrong posture and all. I just kept quiet.
I would smile and say something like "this is what works for our family" then politely change the topic "please pass the bean dip."

Then they want to know where she goes for violin lesson, how much it costs and all.. Not that I don't want to share the information, but they are not curious for info to send kids to learn. Just want to know and comment.. negative , unwanted comments.
What to do?
Respond to their question with another question " Are you considering lessons?"  then, after they answer "no" politely change the topic "please pass the bean dip."

« Last Edit: March 22, 2011, 09:44:24 AM by Twinergy » Logged
TmS
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« Reply #6 on: March 22, 2011, 11:06:13 AM »

My MIL is a school principal and she tried to tell me that teaching my son to read before school would leave him with a massive vocabulary and no imagination!!!

These myths about the right time to do this or that are just that myths.

I completely agree with twinergy "she has an absolute ball, she can learn technique after she learns appreciation the important thing to us is that she wants to and enjoys doing it" then change the subject.

As for the asking for details that's just so they've got more information for when they have a gossip session later and I love twinergy's response.

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nellie
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« Reply #7 on: March 22, 2011, 08:34:05 PM »

I had the same problem but with reading. I was buying all these board books for my baby when my FIL was against it and being skeptical about 'forcing' my baby to read books so early. My husband and I had to buy books behind his back and I have to admit we didn't handle it well when we decided not to visit them as often as we used to. Of course, once my baby really can read at 14mo, he changed his side and say, "yah, of course babies can read, they learn walking and eating don't they??"

When my baby walks at 7mo I too got negative comments on how the crawling phase is crucial for her writing and reading skills in the future and to letting the baby be a baby as long as she can be etc. When people commented this and that my frequently used respond was "she was a big baby" and went on and on with my c-sect experience. Usually if I leave, they will chase me and get back to it and if I change the subject they will change the channel back to it. So, non-stop talking was the right way to go for me. When they get annoyed or tired, they'll leave  LOL


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