A general observation

[Celeste]

Dear All,

I wanted to ask you all a question. Since we all seem to be parents who spend a lot of quality time with our babies/toddlers and try and teach them positive things, you all are the right people to ask this question.

I have noticed an additional 'benefit' from what we are doing. My daughter seems to be a lot easier to train (in terms of manners and general know-how) than other kids the same age whose parents dont spend so much time with them and dont do this right brain programme. For instance- she is really well behaved in comparison to her peers and I havent really had to scold her or anything. I just tell her something once (or twice) and she gets the point and listens. I have never really had a problem with her putting small objects in her mouth, which is a real problem for many of my friends whose kids have to be constantly supervised. I have a lot of breakable, valuable objects around the house but she never goes for them because I told her they aren't toys. All my furniture is white and she has  never dirtied it nor has she written on walls. She isnt destructive either - she tends to look after her toys. Basically I have none of the problems that all my friends seem to be having.

Do  you think this is a by-product of right brain teaching? What I  mean is, do you think it is easier for them to understand things because we have been stimulating their brains from a young age?

[nhockaday]

My son is pretty well behaved, for the most part. He is much better out than at home, but at home he knows he can test me    But I must say, he is the most well-behaved 2 year old I have seen. I always thought it is because I stay at home with him and he is not around other kids. I'm sure the learning stuff helps, mostly because you are spending quality time with your child.

[Celeste]

I initially thought it was also bcs I am a stay at home mom but then so are most of the other moms around me.

 For instance, my sister is also a stay at home mom but she doesnt really spend that much time with her kids (they are usually with the nanny or the grandparents) and certainly doesnt do this right brain programme. Anyway, her kids are a real handful. They are very destructive (they are always breaking things - even the older ones who are 8 and 9), she has virtually had to turn her entire home into a child-safety zone i.e. she has put bedsheets on  her sofas and her expensive rugs, removed all breakables etc. She used to joke with me that I would have to do the same and re-upholster all my white sofas but so far, I have not had to do this and any of the stains on the sofas are all caused by her kids when they visit. I have been doing the right brain programe with her toddler (1 years and 6 months) for two months now and we have noticed a BIG difference in her behaviour. Whereas she used to be a very destructive child who you couldnt leave unattended for even a second, she is now MUCH better behaved. She knows not to put small things in her mouth and she doesn't try and pick up vases and other things which arent toys.

Of course, the odd accident does happen with toddlers - I'm not saying that it doesnt bcs that is only natural- it's just that I have noticed that I don't seem to have the same problems with my child that my friends and relatives have with their kids who arent doing early learning. I can sit fairly comfortably in someone else's house knowing that my daughter will not want to break their valuables. I was just interested to know if other parents have  this same experience.

Because I am beginning to think that early learning has additional benefits such as better coordination, greater attention span, greater social skills, understanding cause and effect, constructive as opposed to destructive behaviour etc.

[nhockaday]

You do make a good observation. FYI, I have off-white furniture and lots of breakables around too!

[carpe vestri vita]

I think it has less to do with how or what we're teaching our kids and much more about how we treat them. Everyone here treats their children as the little miracles they are. There is no reason a baby can't learn a skill like reading, so there's no reason the same baby can't learn an easier skill like identifying which objects are toys.

Quality time is a big thing too. Just because someone is a stay-at-home parent doesn't mean that they interact positively with their children. Some parents only interact with their kids to tell them not to do something. We make a point of using every free minute we have to help our kids understand the world. There is a huge difference in the quality of the time we spend with our kids compared to other parents.

The last factor is that learning needs to be presented in a joyful, factual manner or it won't work. Logically then our kids see us happily interacting with them, responding to their cues, and respecting their interests. Kids learn from example, so they happily interact with us, respond to our cues, and respect us. It's a positive reinforcement spiral: The more we respect them, the more they respect us. But there is no reason that a parent needs to have educational motives to behave that way.

The next time there is a child misbehaving in public, look at the way the parents interact with the child. There is no respect there, and they get none back.

So while early education is doing wonders for our children, I think this is one thing that we have to take credit for as parents, not teachers.

[Nikita]

There are benefits, but there are detriments too. I childproof things but she works out how to get through door barriers and cupboard locks. I was amazed a few days ago to see her sitting at a table with a bowl of cereal and milk and spoon she had got by herself, at 25 months old. Leave the room for a few minutes to hang clothes on the line and come back to that. Amazing! So independent. She'd been in the cupboard, the fridge and a drawer. WOW! Except not so fantastic when I walked out into the hallway and discovered the work-station. A floor covered in cereal and milk (that overflowed the bowl).

[LM]

That is so true, my son is 17 months and he is so well-behaved. he listens when I tell him lovingly not to do something. he knows what to play with(toys), and what not to play with. He does not throw tantrums, he communicates with us in his own way what he wants and we respond to that. My husband and I spend good quality time with him.

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