How do you judge when your children are arguing

[joni2009]

I have 2 children the one is 7 years and the other is 1 y and 6 mo.Sometime they are arguing about playing whith some toys.Our bigger child doesn't want to share  some  toys.Or they want to play with one and the same toy in particular moment.What do you do in this case?Do you judge what to do your children or you will leave them to decide by themselves what to do?I will be very grateful  for your opinions.
Tanya

[Twinergy]

I prefer to facilitate problem resolution between my children rather than solve the conflicts for them or sit back and let them work it out on their own.   Here is some great advice from Becoming the Parent You Want to Be:
Helping Children Work Through Conflict
2-Year-Old Grabs All the Toys
The Importance of Modeling
Assumptions for Successful Conflict Resolution

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EDITED to fix broken links

[hypatia]

Your 7 yo does not want to share but it's also the stage when under 2s discover they can grab anything they see and scream the second they encounter resistance :-)

There were 2 kids at home with us this week-end (a TIRING!) and the 18mo was screaming every single time her 4yo brother was playing with something. she would then rush towards him and rip it off his hands. The 4yo was giving up almost every time and was a very passive child. A few times, I heard the mom telling the 4yo 'give it to her before she screams'.
I felt so sorry for that little boy! The 18mo does not speak at all so I understand it's her way of communicating but she's developing bad habits and that's not fair on the older one.

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