Very interesting insight, Nee1, loved reading the excerpts you have quoted.
As far as ability to control those muscles -- here is an interesting piece of information.
When he had our first girl we lived in LA, infamous for its traffic. And I had to commute quite a bit due to attending number of births. Since my baby was nursing exclusively she commuted with me -- to prenatal appoitments, checking on the newborn babies and even to births
Since she was not using diapers ( and using her miniature potty from day 14) I had to stop to put her on the potty when she needed to. Sometimes in LA traffic, just to get off the freeway at the closest exit in a rush hour can take quite a few minutes. A number of times, it was a bit of a wait. I would usually talk to her, saying that I heard her and we are getting off, and she should not feel bad if she can not wait. She would wait in most cases!
Pretty unbelievable one can say, especially according to all the books on potty readiness and "ability to control those muscles"
I think babies are capable of so much more then we can imagine, and they are eager to communicate and show it off. But also I think it is important to realize that sometimes they would not do things just because, for no apparent reason, but simply because they are stubborn, or want to make sure it was theor idea, or what not.
My second one for example -- he is VERY bright 2.3 years old. He speaks eloquently, knows his geometrical shapes, numbers, letters, words. But something happened somewhere sometime about the colors. I think my mom was trying to "show him off" at about 1.4 years old, when we had visitors over. Asking him over and over again different colors. Ever since, whenever he is asked colors, he is reacting to it as if he is tested and purposely tells the most remote color to the one he is asked about "green" or "blue" when he is asked about smth pink, etc He knows them, but he is simply determined to say different color
Sometimes I wonder if our toddlers take a stand like that on the issues that are so important for us, parents. Potty training included. They are little people with their own reasoning and desire to do it, they love to be praised but they may be annoyed if we constantly expect something from them, and get disappointed if they dont "perform"
Just an observation...