to homeschool or to Montessori that is thy question?

[Kimba15]

I need some help!!! sorry for the rambling

I thought I would be an afterschooler the Mummy who keeps teaching even though school has finshed but afterschooling my eldest dd is turning into a crock. It is a battle to get her to do anything. as she complains she is too tired and really she only wants to play outside or play with her dollys. I personally feel she has gone backwards in her reading and is not progressing the 'way' i think she should. I have really enjoyed the whole early learning process but feel that I could have her much further along if my day was not interrupted by going too nd rom school which is about 20 minutes away approx 1 hour return trip both ways so i am going to write a pro's and con's list of both and ask for peoples' opinions.

Montessori
Pro's

She has access to wonderful Montessori materials which she loves to play with.

A different peaceful learning environment where she can learn at her own pace.

Wonderful, loving caring teachers who geniually care about her as an individual

• [/li   Flexible (to a degree) with her learning and are likely to allow her to start school early
  
    A chance to be part of a wider community with parents who are of the same mindset as I am
  

The chance to work with kids who are older than her and make friends with older and younger children and do work at a higher level

• .[/li My eldest dd loves school already and jumps out of bed in the morning and can't wait to get there
  
  educate the whole child and prepare's them for life by incorporating life skills into the curriculum. Cooking,cleaning care of oneself (in the preschool) I am unsure how it is still incorporated into the other cycles
  

cons

Getting the school to push Miss s along (I have already seen that S  will take the easy road whenver she can and she is extremely stubborn and does ot take well to being told what to do) and the school don't really like to push the kids feeling it is against Montessori philosophy

I will forever need to stay on their back to make sure she is challenged.

some of the work covered in cycle 2 (yrs 1-4) I have already covered
[/list] The school fees for 2 kids is close to 12K a year this chews into the money i get to spend on other resources

That no matter what school I send my dd's to they are going to get to a level where they can not be progressed any further educationally because they can only go so far in one cycle or year and then have to wait until they are 'old enough' to move to the next level.

Homeschooling

Pros

My rules I set the timetable and the agenda

No need for school runs or worrying about the logistics of getting child to this extra curricular activity at this time as someone is their to take them

The ability to write my own curriculum

• I can work at each childs own pace
  
  Money to spend on extra things like art and craft and sports because money is not tied up in school fees
  
  More time to spend with my girls
  
  No need to worry about other kids being bullys or other nasty behaviour
  
  I can keep at the pace of my kids and work ahead if i want to
  

cons

at some stage I would like to return to work for my own sake and earn money for our household to. (i like to be able to finacially contribute it does make me feel good as a person) and some adult conversation from time to time would be fantastic to.

Spending all day every day with my dd who im sure I would have to stand on top of her fo her to do the work

feeling overwhelmed by the task of educating my dd and meeting the governments 8 core sections of criteri
[/list] finding time to make sure they socialise and myself to

WHile a good homeschooling network excits in Adelaide homeschooling is very frowned upon here.
[/list][/li][/list] I really love the Montessori Philosophy and feel both my DD's would get something out of it

I have made friends with the other Mums at the school and i really like them
[/list] Being part of a school commuity which is warm caring and loving.

Is there anyhting I have missed. I don't have to make a decision right now to homeschool her, but I am so unsure about what to do I guess if i am unhappy I can pull her out at anytime and bring her home. I just want to make sure there is nothing I am missing. At this point of time because she is sooo happy at school i think I might leave her there for now buuuuut if she continues to go backwards what am I to do, because sometimes I feel this is my fault because I could have kept her at home but I wonder how much S is not trying so she 'fits in' with the other kids??

Sorry for the rambling I am trying to get all my thoughts down on paper so I can look at it logically.

Thanks for any of your opinions

Kimba[/list]

[Tanikit]

It sounds like you have covered pretty much everything - the older a child gets however the more adjustment it will take if you do pull her out to homeschool her. I remember my 3 year old wanting to go and play with her friends she left at preschool when I brought her home - an older child will remember for longer and possibly miss her friends more. I used to feel guilty for almost 9 months about removing her from the school cause she did miss the social aspect and the play. However she has since forgotten much of it and is happy at home playing with her sister and we do go to other activities too.

You also need to decide what for you is most important because there are pros and cons to each - if you know what your major aim or goal is for education/socialisation/time for yourself etc and which is most important to you it would be easier to decide.

Our decision to homeschool was based on similar reasons that you have listed - getting my child educated at her level, the cost of the schools, socialisation etc However there were tipping points and priorities (and we had less of a choice of good schools) - in the end some of the things we benefit from (like no morning rush to get everyone ready) were not even on our initial list - I can cope with the morning rush, but boy its a bonus not to have to!

Good luck with your decision. Maybe it isn't time to make the decision yet - if you do need to I think you would know more clearly.

[Korrale4kq]

Let's see if I can address some of your pros and cons.

The car ride: you could play learning DVDs or CDs in the car. Or have your daughter read, read to you, or listen to audio books. That gives you 40 minutes of after schooling time.

I know you feel the need to contribute financially to the family, but if there isn't too much of a financial strain you don't NEED to. Maybe keeping in mind that you ARE contributing in a way that may not be financial, but had life long benefits for your children. And you will be saving your family $12k a year.

As for the adult interaction, maybe you could get that through extra curricula activites for the kids. Girl guides, little athletics.  My mum stated home with us but played sports at the PCYC several days a week. There was a child minding service there, I loved going to it.  Also joining a homeschool community might help. It also helps increase your daughters social interactions. 

Many of the Montessori aspects that your daughter is being immersed in at school can be enjoyed at home. There are many websites and hoods dedicated to creating a Montessori home. And YouTube has many amazing videos that can give you the basis of presenting stations.

This is my personal opinion... I plan to homeschool James for his formative years. Probably until middle school. I think that gives him time to build a strong moral character and to have a sense of self. Hopefully he will have good study habits and the desire to be a life long learner. Once be hits middle school I will allow him to decide.

[Kimba15]

It is a really tough decision to make! There are so many aspects of my dd's school I absolutely love but I am finding the afterschooling quite hard because of the tiredness issue. SHe really is very resistant to it all. I am so close now to teaching her composition in writing and I she is almost ready for maths 3 in JG. I just get so excited about teaching her.

The school has so many wonderful aspects if it was just a plain old traditionl school I would homeschool her but it is a Montessori school and it is just lovely. The classrooms feel like home ohhh I am soo confused.

ANy one successefully afterschooling???

[Kimba15]

I wish I could do half nd half! Half the time @ montessori the other half at home!!

[Mandabplus3]

Oh me too! Half half would be perfect!
After schooling is really hard for at least the first year of school. The kids are too tired. We do a fair chunk of after schooling BEFORE school.  Early risers here.
I do as much as I can find using digital technology, I find they won't resist a DVD on a math concept but will sometime baulk at a page of sums. They happily watch magic school bus in the car on the way to school and we discuss it too. They will also use a computer program too.
Any other stuff we do I try to make it look like arts and crafts. Map puzzles, human anatomy puzzles, coloring in.
Realistically the best I can hope for is a deeper level of knowledge than their average peers but I can't expect to give them the education I want them to have with out giving up school. So is it a success? Yes they are at the top of their grades across all areas, they know many things their peers havnt heard of. I want more time with them, but I am not yet prepared to ditch school.
Really you need to think through what you want for your kids. What is you overall aim? I personally think my kids will be entrepreneurs ( personalities/self employed parents) so I was aiming for well rounded knowledge base with top scores for entry to any university course they choose. My educational goal is to maximize their opportunities and maximize exposure to knowledge. The school system ( if carefully monitored) can do most of that for me as well as provide many opportunities I can't. Other people will have completely different goals and that's OK just know what yours are before you decide. It's not a forever decision either. You can change your mind

[Kerileanne99]

Something that came up when we investigated a handful of Montessori schools- whilst none of them advertised it, it turns out that if you specifically ask, they all (at least in our area, so maybe yours as well!) will allow you to share your spot...I.e., you sign a contract and find someone else that will go on the days that your child does not...we had considered this option as it allowed us to be more flexible...my child would have gone two days per week and a friends daughter would go three, splitting the tuition accordingly. This was possible only in the toddler group and the EC (3-6) here, but if you are on the fence it might be a better fit for you

[Kimba15]

@Kerileanne Miss S has been invited to extended day which is now 4 1/2 days a week. The school have suggested that she may even start 'official school' early. Starting in feb of next year rather than in october next year. Which means she would start school at age 4 1/2 rather than 5

Miss S did say to me today that she really likes 'homeschool with Mummy' so I am unsure if that means she likes spending time with me or prefers me over school. She can hardly wait to get there and loves it when she is there. I also don't know if she is in the beginning stages of getting bored today she 'faked' she was sick so she could come home. I was sooooooooooooooooooooooooo cross with her but have started wondering if this is a 'sign' of things to come. I know what she is like once she is bored she is almost impossible to control.

My husband has said that he sees school as a supplement to what I am doing and I can do more with the girls when they get home from school to help them stay ahead. He does not want them to miss out on school and the social aspect plus other things that they school provides like school camp. Montessori philosophy and the ability to do make life long friends and all the great things that go with school. I said to him if schoolis only a supplement to what I am giving at home why bother sending them when we can use the money for extra curricular activities such as sport, music and other things in which both the girls could still socialise with other children.

I just need to sit down and have it out with him. Even if we leave the girls there until they turn six than make a decision. I willbe watching my dd very closely over the next 2 terms to see how her behaviour is going if it gets bad or any more 'sick' days than i will be having a very serious discussion with my husband.Right now we have just skimmed the surface and he is still very against homeschooling so if we choose to do it we both need to be on the same page.

[Kerileanne99]

Maybe this will help with the socialization question regarding homeschooling...research based with lots of anecdotal support as well...
http://www.amazon.com/The-Well-Adjusted-Child-Benefits-Homeschooling/dp/1600651070/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1340019915&sr=8-1&keywords=the+well+adjusted+child

I was thrilled with this book and it helped me to successfully counter many of my. Hubby's concerns...

[Tanikit]

Try and get your husband to look into homeschooling and really to think about all aspects of it. My own DH had his own concerns about it - some about how I would handle it and some about the socialisation. I think it is normal for them to think like that - usually the problem is that the mother is further ahead in her thinking and has already covered that ground long before the husband even starts thinking about it. He needs his own time to think properly about pros and cons. And then he needs to read about what is said about homeschooling - there are a lot of books written about it that stress the successes of homeschooling. It is normal for children to not want to go to school and at age 4 some of it may be separation anxiety and wanting to be with Mummy, some of it may be genuinely not feeling well, or it could be anxiety and unhappiness at school. There is so much that an individual education can give a child - my DD has been sick recently and so we could do just what she could manage - it didn't have to be nothing like it would have been had I kept her home from school and it didn't have to be a full schedule which is what it would have been had she been sent to school. If she is bored at home we can go out, take a walk or go somewhere else, we can go on holdiays at out of peak learning times and if there is something interesting to learn on a holiday we can read up about it beforehand and then use it as a field trip.

Talk to your husband - but you will probably need to bring it up gradually over a few sessions with him. Maybe just keep sending him interesting emails about it Good luck. Its good that you have some time and can see what is happening with her at school too.

[JainaRei]

I think part of whether you homeschool is definatly about yourself. If you find fulfilment, love learning yourself and really enjoy teaching your child from home then you'll be a happy Mummy. When kids are young, when mummy is happy with a situation they will be happy with it to. Obviously there is more to it than that, but for the few years my mum had to homeschool us she found it such a hassel (She balked when I told her I wanted to homeschool my future children), and at the time that affected my attituded towards homeschool.

My young SIL has been homeschooled for the past 2 years and the first year her mum found it such a struggle and couldn't get all the housework done that she used to (a big thing to her). That 1st year little SIL voiced so many times that she wated to go back to school, even though she had no friends there and was bullied there. Now MIL is vey happy with homeschool has adjusted to it and SIL is also happy with it too. Maybe its a chicken and egg case but I think Mum being content has helped SIL to have a better attitude.

Some friends of ours started homeschool just over a year ago and the mum was so excited at teaching her kids. She had no big adjustment issues (the kids did miss some friends). The kids are so excited they can learn what they are interested in. The eldest boy who is about 9 is interested in WW2 at the moment and he can rattle off facts about the war that most adults don't remember. He'll also tell you about all the vehicles and weapons that were involved in the war. The daughter has never been to regular school and says things like mummy I want to learn about butterflys tomorrow. Mummy has to research for an hour or so the night before but daughter is up early in the morning eager to begin learning. They are in Europe at the moment and spent time learning about Europe before they went. Now they are there, everywhere they go can be a classroom.

The temperment of the child will come into play as well. In regular school I was bored a lot. I never learnt good study habits because I got good enough grades without trying too hard. Good enough was enough for me especially in subjects I didn't like that much. But for the subjects that I did enjoy I would read further ahead in the text than what was being taught eager to learn all I could. If I had learnt good study and memory retention habits, I would have retained that knowledge much longer and also not found  Uninversity such a struggle. I was so used to cruising, by the time I got to uni I didn't know any other way and had no skills to draw on to study effectively. I barely passed and never found a job that used my degree.

I've never seen a Montessori school in action and don't know how good they would be at encouraging the child who is capable but doesn't have the drive to push themselves (in regular school teachers don't push because it's easier to have children all on the same level). In my opinion it is important for the child to have the skills to seek out knowledge for themselves, and to have  the hunger and the skills developed to persue excellence in whatever they are interested in before they reach high school. Whichever school environment you can find that will do that for your child then use that one.

[evachong]

For me... I am very concern about my pocket money as in Malaysia... Everything is expensive and even I want my child in the monetessori center it will be cost me about RM 650++ for a month... hahaha! Terrible... expensive oh! So I have no choice and I think I am very clever mother... I did my homeschool lesson which combine of all method... Montessori... Doman.... Shichida... and also tweedlewink .... so... If you want to know how I work it out... Please drop to my blog... http://littlemommy2012.blogspot.com oh ya... if can please comment if I am doing wrong... on my method...

hihih... I also try to figure out how I can teach my little bao bao in a fun learning method.... that would be interesting for her!

[Kimba15]

Okay, so I had an introduction to cycle 1 today and the equipment the kids will be getting to use and I must admit I am a little taken by the whole thing. The equipment is beautiful and beautifully introduced. I can see my dd being way ahead in English/Social studies and some sciences but she is not up to scratch in the math department (its her least favourite subject) but i think she will learn very quickly with the materials. They are so hands on and the materials no matter how much i spend I just can not afford to have them at home they are very expensive.

I also had a class parent/teacher chat and the teacher has devised a plan for sophia next term and I came 'out the closet' so to speak and showed the teacher what we are working on at home. She was very impressed and with what sophia has done and wants to colaborate with me more in devising a program with Sophia. Which I must admit I was really iimpressed with. I thought I was going to be in an uphill battle with the school to try and get them to listen but the teacher has recognised her ability and wants to work with me. PHEW.....

I have not completely ruled out homeschooling either but I must admit the scale is weighing more to Montessori than homeschooling. My husband is now more on board with the homeschooling idea now that I have proven to him our kids will still be socialised. I spoke to a few of the homeschoolers in Adelaide and they said if you are happy with the school and you can see your dd is progressing, happy and not being bullied than why leave?  There are other consideration though. The school being a Montessori has no competive sports program as in joing a netball team or footy team etc etc. I personally think sport is really important and I think there are many things that can be learnt from sport particularly being part of team and it is just another cost to our already growing school fees... 

I don't have to make a decision yet I will see how Sophia holds up with extended day and continue to afterschool and weekend school as much as I can with her.  btw if you would like to see the school here is a link to the website http://www.montessori.sa.edu.au/

Thoughts?

[Mandabplus3]

Sounds great! It looks like you are off to a good start with the school. You have plenty of years ahead, see how it goes. It does look like a beautiful school to spend all day

[Kimba15]

Okay so miss Sophia has started in cycle 1. She is doing great with the math in fact she has almost completed two math workbooks in 3 weeks and is coming home and not arguing about doing ixl. In fact asking to do it. She asks that I sit with her and do her math book with her, which is me just sitting next to her while she does her maths. She does not seem to be too interested in doing much else and her teacher seems to be letting it go for the time being.

This gets on my nerves and frustrates me buuuut I have to let it go and let the teacher do her job. If at the parent teacher interview later on this term and I see Sophia is not progressing like I would hope then I can have a discussion with my husband about bringing her home.

I have already been fobbed off by the teacher about Sophia's reading level. Apparently its okay to drop 11 lvls in reading??!?. I asked for Sophia to be given lvl 25 + but apparently there are no books that are at her psychological level. So I just sign off the books Sophia brings home and and I get her to read her chapter books to me instead and I put in her reader log what she's actually is reading.

So that is where I am at. At this point of time I am certainly leaning towards homeschool but I still am torn. Sophia does seem to really enjoy school so at the moment I am letting it go. I still keep her ahead as much as possible at home. So we will see.

I will keep you updated.

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