Most doctors and midwives don't even do them anymore. My midwife said none of them do it at the office I go to, and it's a big office! The good thing about midwives is that they use mineral oil and stretch you the whole time you are pushing. I didn't tear at all because of that. However, I felt and saw the aftermath of all the stretching for a couple of days, but it was far better than tearing and having to get stitches. Ask your doctor if he/she does them. It was one of the first questions on my list!

Hi! You mentioned the "aftermath of all the stretching"..what are they? Loose muscles, soreness? Thanks!

Hi Nadia

I have some advice for you on how to dramatically reduce your risk of needing an episiotomy. Use the Epi-No childbirth trainer. Make sure you get the Delphine Plus model, which is both for exercising your pelvic floor muscles and stretching your perineum. The stretching only begins from three weeks before your due date, so you have time.

From what I have read, massaging the perineum is far less effective than Epi-No. I think it's terrible that so many women have episiotomies - and so few obstetricians and midwives tell their patients about Epi-No.

I used it successfully, reaching the stated target just in time for my baby's birth. I felt so empowered because I had an idea of what the pushing stage would feel like. You feel the burn that so many women describe, and you teach yourself to relax instead of clenching up when that happens.

However, I ended up with an emergency cesarean, so that's where my story ends.

Good luck Nadia!

Maddy

Thanks! =) This is quite a find! It's very expensive though and only distributed in Australia and Singapore? It's not even available on Amazon..I'll try and look for a distributor here (the Philippines)..hope it's available!

After my last child (not my last, as I will have more, but thus far...), they recommended I do a CALM birth course, a new thing out in Australia.  Actually, I dont need to attend a Calm birth class, I need doctors and midwives who do as I want and have made clear all along. All they have to do is give me an epidural as soon as I ask for it, and things would be very calm!!!!  But my first 3 births they have been determined to hold off on the epidural (public hospital, no private health insurance..we dont need it in Australia, hospital and doctors are free but you get what you're given when they want to give it)...
I learned that due to my ABSOLUTE fear of childbirth, I dont dilate. 2cm is all I get to, until they give me the epidural... then it's straight to 10cm, ready to push, and them not believing me!! that was my experience with the first, then I told them of this with the 2nd...same result, but still didnt believe me, til I got the epidural at 2 cm and was ready to push.  3rd child, 2cm, finally got epidural, ready to push...they insisted I needed to do a bowel motion, so I grabbed a dish, they all left the room, and returned 10 mins later to me still doing the BM (and giving birth at same time!)...the baby was half delivered in a bowl of poo while no-one was around.  So for the 4th kid I explain all this (yet again), and was given an epidural at 2cm as soon as I asked for it!!!  yet once again they werent believing I was needing to push, and poor bub was kept waiting longer than she needed to because they wouldnt examine me to find I was 10cm dilated when I told them I would be...so I just lay there twidling my thumbs til they decided they better check things out cos "nothing was happening". So they take a look "ooh, you better push now" (no kidding!!).
The other thing that I did find bad, was with 3rd kid, epidural didnt take properly, as I was stuck on one side, and I was half numb (one half), then when it came time to push it had totally worn off, and they did not believe I was in pain.  I was screaming my head off, "I'm splitting in two, I'm dying!!", and they were saying, "No, that's not pain you're experiencing, it's pressure!!" (I'd had 2 already, I knew I was in PAIN!! ).

Hilarious! It's my first to hear this kind of story =) I can imagine the doctors' reaction when they found that you're already 10cm dilated as you said you'd be hehe! How long does the epidural lasts anyway? You mentioned that it has worn off during the delivery of your 3rd kid right?

I dug into the recesses of my memory, and lo.. it was there.

Hypnobirthing. The Mongan method by Marie Mongan.  www.hypnobirthing.com

Mind you, I tried hypnosis/hypnotherapy to lose weight, and it did nothing. I lost the money it cost me to attend the hypnosis session with licensed experienced practitioner. But maybe I need to listen to subliminal messages and hypnosis on cd over and over... I might be a tough cookie... it may be easier for some.
And have you heard of TENS? It involves numbing pain with electrical pulses...

This is an interesting pain-relief method..but I doubt I can be 'calm' enough come labor day to enter the hypnotized state. Teehee! Thanks for the link though! I'll certainly look more into it. Gotta see all the options out there =)

My friend, a midwife, gave me a book to read with this baby, which had a cd at the back.. will try to find out who it's by, but it's based on Dr grantly Dick-read's teaching that fear causes pain.  Might work for you, but for me, it was pain that caused the fear. I was afraid of pain, but I didnt imagine the pain.  If I'd gone into childbirth and there wasnt pain, my fear would have gone.  my fear has nearly gone because finally I got an epidural the moment I asked for one.  Mind you, my birth plan this last baby was this:

I want an EPIDURAL,
and i want it NOW!!!
(Please)


That was all.  Got the message across. Why should we suffer?? I think the epidural is the best invention in the history of the world, and whoever invented it.... I LOVE YOU!!! (You deserve the NOBEL PEACE PRIZE)

Hahaha! I'm afraid I'd be very much like you when labor comes because I have a really low-threshold for pain! You're lucky that you've been given pain-relief the moment you asked for it because I heard stories that though they begged for it, it was denied for reasons like "not yet dilated enough" or "too dilated for an epidural". Oh well, much of what will happen we can't control anyway however well we prepare for it (see nhockaday's story) so I guess I should stop worrying about pain =)

Nhockaday, thanks for the links! I'm reading the user reviews now =)

Bienvenidos Eridania! Su pais parece muy bonita. Perdon por mi espanol, estoy un estudiante solamente de que lingua. Soy de Filipinas y casi nuevo en este forum. Hasta luego! =)

Mozart's Sleigh Ride (Prenatal Music) =)

Thanks for the suggestion! Any particular Yoga DVD you found helpful?

Thank you so much for the ebook linlim! It's heaven-sent! Hope the rest of the pages will be available. Thanks again! 

Thank you for the very helpful advice Zaja! =) I'll browse over the web-link that you gave. As early as now, I'll search for those essential oils that you mentioned as they are quite rare here in my country. Even lavender essential oil is hard to find! 

Good for you to have prepared very well for your labor. It really paid off isn't it? Kudos to you! Starting tomorrow, I'll do pelvic exercises as you have done. I used to be active in my second trimester but now, even climbing the stairs would make me pant a little!

One good thing though is my baby is heads-down as early as now and hopefully she'll stay in that position. I really would like to have a natural child-birth sans episiotomy so I'm also doing Kegel exercises (thank goodness this exercise doesn't require me to sweat!) and would soon do perineum massage.

Thanks again, I'm inspired! =)

I'm sure you yourself have enjoyed a lot building the nursery! What fun! Thanks for the great ideas I've picked up! =)

Hi! I am no expert but from what I've read, you should try to be as healthy as possible and avoid stress-which has a major effect on fertility. Try taking vitamins that your nutritionist approves, having a regular exercise program, and praying would certainly help! I have heard wonderful stories from friends and relatives who made a devotion to Saints (mostly St. Bernadette) and they haven't been failed. And of course, a consultation with your fertility doctor would also be helpful =) 

In the course of the contractions, I was arm wrestling with my husband who was suprised with my strength - given the pain I was experiencing!  However, after about 12 hours of labor, I ended up having a c-section due to the umbilical cord being wrapped around my son's neck.  After I gave birth to my 6lb 10oz son and saw and touched him for the first time, who cared about the pain?!?!? I was so overwhelmed with happiness and excitement at seeing him.  It was one of the most wonderful feelings I have ever experienced.  Going through the pain was all worth it!!!

Arm wrestling with hubby while on labor..maybe I should try that one to take my mind off pain! =)

Hi Janet, I'm a Filipina too! Welcome and hope to see you in the 'Tagalog' forums! There are quite a few of us Filipinas here =)