My child seems bored, what can I do?

[trulypearl]

I have a 9 months old baby boy.  I have started Doman's reading program with him at 7 months.  I then started the math program at 8 months.  I have 6 reading sessions and 9 math sessions daily.  I do most of the sessions in the mornings and some in the afternoon.  I use a joyous and happy voice when presenting the cards.  I present the cards at least 30 minutes apart.  I even tried to play peek-a-boo, sing, and tickle to get him excited before the session.  But, everytime I place him in highchair for his sessions of cards he automatically turns his head because he knows its time for the cards.  I also tried introducing new cards and retiring old cards at a faster rate.  That didn't seem to work either.  Help...what am I doing wrong?

P.S. thanks ahead of time for your suggestions and ideas.

Sad mom...

[DadDude]

6 reading sessions and 9 math sessions?  If he's bored, maybe it's because you're using too many sessions.

If he's turning his head, he's associating the cards with No Fun.  That's bad.  I would suggest taking a break for, like, a week.  If he still turns his head, I would wait for a month.

My boy is older but I think the advice is the same: if he seems bored...Do Something Else.  There's so much to do that is just as educational as Doman stuff.  Like reading good old fashioned books with the kid on your lap.

Also, I think my boy went through a stage toward the end of his first year when he didn't want to be read to.  We came back to reading to him after his first birthday and he loved it and never stopped loving it since.

No worries!

[trulypearl]

I do read books and he enjoys that a lot.  I do 6 reading sessions and 9 math sessions because I am following the program.  I have two sets of reading cards and am introducing the dot cards along with the addition equations.  I guess maybe I should cut back and only use one set of reading cards. 

Thanks for your suggestion.

[cassidy336]

That really sounds like a lot of cards.  I realize you are following the program, but maybe it is a bit too much.  Also, how often are you showing a card before retiring it?  I know they say to do it several times but your son may be getting it much quicker and you are just boring him by showing him things more than once.  Have you noticed if he it makes a difference if you are using new words?

Also, are you ready to try showing him Little Reader/PowerPoint instead of just cards?  My son doesn't like flashcards but he would sit at the computer for hours if I let him looking at the bits on the computer. 

Every little bit you do makes a difference, so just realize you don't have to be perfect to be helping your son learn. 

[trulypearl]

Thanks cassidy336.  I will cut back on the cards and maybe trying using the computer.  I will post again after the computer and you all know if he likes that better.

[littlemamapuz]

We do 3 lessons, one each while eating breakfast, lunch and dinner.  I have the laptop on the table and he eats while we watch little reader.  Since it takes him awhile to eat, I can go through our entire lessons of reading and math all at once.  So my suggestion is maybe give him some food while he's in his highchair.  If not, maybe choose another location for learning time.

Good Luck!  

[purplefungi]

Maybe using the computer will hellp. Maybe the different sounds in some the presentations will hold his interest more.  Babies love "puters!"

I would probably cut back a little bit and see if that helps. Maybe he is being overstimulated.

Good luck!

KUP!

[luckylucy]

Don't worry KUP!

My baby doesn't have much tolerance for the paper flash cards either.  But she loves the LR computer flash cards with the picture and the audio sounds that match the word.  The multi-sensory approach is so much more stimulating for her, and I guess it would be, wouldn't it?

I do LR flash cards three times a day.  We do at least 4 categories (animals, body parts, fruit, actions) and there are between 6-10 words in each category.  So she sees the same 24 words 3x/day.  I don't really care if it's not exactly the Doman way to a T.   I mean, what's the point in doing it that way if my baby finds it too painful to sit still for and therefore doesn't learn anything, or worse grows an aversion to it. 

The right thing for your baby is for you to find a daily program that works for her and entertains her. 

For us, it's using LR.  Now learning is a lot more fun (don't get me wrong, sometimes she turns away from the computer and is done with it) and she actually is learning and wanting to learn more through out the day.  Not so much by wanting to do more LR but, for instance, she points to things now all the time.  I guess she wants me to tell her what they are or somehow explain them to her.

Also, if you do introduce LR to you baby, I would take a two week break from all this flash card stuff so maybe he'll forget about it.  And then I would start with some fun flashing on the computer.  Babies love the animal flash cards because of the animal sounds.  That really gets my baby going.

Don't worry and best of luck!

[Ayesha Nicole]

Dear TrulyPearl & Everyone,

This is my flexible schedule for the moment that we achieve most days, depending on the interest of my children (I stop before they want me to stop, even if I do not finish my "ideal day"):

After Breakfast > show LR categories + YBCR 2 DVD

After Lunch > show LR categories + YBCR 1 DVD and cards from starter/1/2

After Dinner > show LR categories + YBCR Starter DVD

Bedtime > Show cards from all three videos + read all three books

I am currently reading Doman Math and will get LM soon and incorporate it as well.

I like to teach them after they eat, because I want them to enjoy the food on a multi-sensory level, which is less experienced when eating while watching tv, etc.  After reading some books about the French culture, I discovered that they are known for enjoying their meals on a passionate multi-sensory level.  The French don't even have cup holders in their cars! because they believe that food is an experience in and of itself, to be enjoyed with people at a dinner table. 

As for my children's mother (me) - I tend to eat on the go because the girls are still learning how to eat properly with a fork and spoon, while constantly testing the laws of gravity with their food.     Once they are able to really feed themselves well, then I will be able to sit down and enjoy the meal with them.    

- Ayesha

[jsmonton]

don't be too rigid with the lessons, the important thing is both of u are enjoying. learning should be fun for both of u.
go with the child's mood, i know that u might have a timetable which u want to follow but it will not be effective if the child is no longer enjoying the lessons.
besides our child is too youg to be stress so much and we should not be as well.
take it easy...

[luckylucy]

Ayesha, how many categories do you show at one session and how many words are in each category.  You have a great schedule!  I wish I was as disciplined and as organized as you. 

[norcalmommy]

My heart goes out to you. I understand how disappointing it can be when the child isn't as interested as we are in the learning. That's what Math was like for me and my 20mo son. 

My son did NOT like the math cards. I could show him one or two, but after that he was just not interested. It took me forever to get to #20 because we had to go so slow.  Little Math has been godsends for us.  I'm doing YBCR for words, but am also starting to incorporate Little Reader.  Now that I'm doing LM, he watches 20 numbers and 3 equations 3x per day ~~~ And he LIKES it!  It's easy and fun for both of us.  Then we do our LR words.  I do the math first since it's what he likes least. Once I showed him the words first and then tried to show math...he made it very clear he wanted more words instead.

My schedule is similar to Ayesha's - but I mostly show before food.  I always put him in his chair at the table for the sessions. It really helps his focus.

Before Breakfast - LM (20 numbers); LR (10 words)
During Breakfast - YBCR DVD #2 (once a week I show a previous YBCR DVD instead)
Before Lunch - LM (20 numbers); LR (10 words)
Before Snack - YBCR Flip Books (starter/1/2)
Before Dinner - LM (20 numbers); LR (10 words)
After Dinner - YBCR Slide Cards (starter/1/2)  This is the only session where my son is not typically in his chair. We will sit on the floor and play games with the cards.

You can see that we're only doing 1 YBCR video per day. We have too many activities to incorporate two sessions. So we play a lot of other games with the words.  I have YBCR words taped up on our walls and we play "Can you show Baby/Teddy/Mommy where "word" is?  And he will run around and point to the different words in our game. We also throw them all on the floor and together 'jump' over certain words.  Anything that makes the words physical and fun.

Good luck to you in finding the right balance with your little one.

[JCS]

my 2 cents is to totally take a break sorry if you have tried this and i didn't read other posts- but i've had a similar experience with both kids and they seem to enjoy it more after they have missed a few days, also really try to use words that your baby likes- personalize them- my son loves any words relating to pirates, peter pan but doesn;'t have an eye for the kit about reading from gentle revolution unless i show it to him in the car at stoplights!

[JCS]

also the break idea is as you know from doman's teaching- but anecdotally it has worked for my kids if it makes you feel better about doing so- and when i took the course at IAHP they did stressto do that so as not to turn the kids off  sometimes i just ask them if they want "to do the words" and if it's a no I change the subject and see if they;re in the mood a bit later

[Ayesha Nicole]

Dear LuckyLucy & Everyone,

My schedule is something that evolved and will continue to evolve - based on the interest of my children.  I was only showing 1 YBCR video per day, until they kept saying "Baby!" (meaning the video) repeatedly, so much so that their demands would turn into crying if I did not show it to them, and they would want to watch the video three times in a row which I thought was too much.  So, I decided to show the other videos and just broke it into three sessions.  And to be honest with you, I had started YBCR program back in January and just read the Parent's Guide about a week ago and then altered a few things - like the double-sided flashcards on most days, and sometimes in place of the books at night and many times before reading the books at night.  My children ask me for what they want and then I give it to them or I will ask them and then gauge their interest level.

I try to show the flashcards on most days, and usually will read the books at night - there are times when I don't because they are too tired or uninterested/bored.  Or I will show them other books if they want to read, but not YBCR flapbooks.  Sometimes when they are watching the videos, they get up and leave - and I tell them that I will turn off the video and then they cry and will usually sit down and continue watching it - although not always. 

I agree with JCS that we as parents must adapt the programs to our children.    There are no absolutes with this.  We as parents should always keep in mind the personal interests of children to determine the subject matter, the format (posterboard flashcards, videos, LR/.ppt), the individual age and stage of development, as well as their personality, and individual learn styles. 

Flexibility is mandatory on our part - or we run the risk of being disappointed in our own selves for not being able to achieve what we think is "ideal" or start to unconsciously compete with other people's schedules that don't work for our children or our lives.  Or as one wise woman in another group said so eloquently - "we should think of our efforts as enrichment" . . . also, "we don't want our children to ever feel that we are disappointed in THEM for not living up to our standards."  Children are very in tune with us whether we realize it not - and this is why the emphasis on JOY is paramount.  If neither parent or child is having fun/joy - then change what you are doing.  This is reiterated more than anything in the three Doman books I have read thus far.  And the same is eluded to with Dr. Titzer's materials.

As far as the LR categories go - there is no real "schedule" at this moment because I am setting up my curriculuum and lessons Doman style for English and Arabic (both Classical Arabic and Modern Standard Arabic versions) in both LR and .ppt (for those who don't have LR) and once I complete it soon, then I will strive to show them 3 - 5 sets of 5 words each in random order (back to back as long as my children ask for "more! more!") two - three times per day.  At them moment, I just basically pick something to play and then they ask for "more!" and I show something else.  But I have to step up my pace on production because time is ticking! 

I am reading the Doman math book at the moment and have the math kit that I will begin using soon.  And for me, I like a schedule to follow because it makes my life easy.  But sometimes, I get stuck in the planning stage and just need to get on with it.  I really want LM because my girls loved the program and most things on the computer.  I like to show them LR & LM and some .ppt after eating because they are happy from eating and they are still strapped in their highchairs, next to the computer.   It works for me now, and I realize that I will have to adapt it for them later.  I also limit the TV and talk with them about what I am doing and have even begun to write out what I say to them as simple sentences to show them in LR once we get to that point (i.e., Momma is cooking eggs; Momma is washing the dishes.  Baba is watching the television.  Sarah is vacuuming [with the hand vac - they LOVE it!]; etc.).  They also help me clean and have taught them to clean up spills or to spot-vacuum after eating, etc.  It is not perfect - but the overall concept is there.  I believe this is what the Montessori style of teaching is.  I also have them put wet clothes into the dryer and to take them out and to "fold" them.  I talk to them as I cook, and explain things to them in simple terms.  And I always try to use positive reinforcememnt techniques with them.

Which brings me to another point - I want to read the Doman book What to Do About Your Brain Injured Child, because in it are the explanations about positive reinforcement that IAHP teaches to parents - it is referenced in one of the Doman books.  I also have an excellent book, Good Behavior Made Easy (from 0 - 12) by Dr. Stephen Garber (psychologist/behaviorist) that focuses mostly on positive reinforecement
http://www.amazon.com/Good-Behavior-Made-Easy-Handbook/dp/1883761301 -

available as preowned book from www.alibris.com
http://www.atlanta-psychologist.com/Stephen-W--Garber.html     

So, again, the point is to tailor your programs to your child, be consistent even with a little, and know that anything is better than nothing! 

- Ayesha

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